


You're Getting Warmer

by Moonllotus



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Non-Magical, Coming of Age, Everyone is American, First Kiss, Fluff, Growing Up, M/M, POV Simon, Romance, Slice of Life, Summer Vacation, Takes place in New York City, Texting, aquarium date, beware of ooc, high school party, supportive friends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-22
Updated: 2019-03-22
Packaged: 2019-11-27 10:05:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18193151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moonllotus/pseuds/Moonllotus
Summary: "Did you know," I shifted my gaze from the tiger sharks swimming above us to Baz and froze. He wasn't even looking at the dome above us. He was watchingme."Do I know?" Baz arched a brow."Um." Fuck. I lost my train of thought and could feel my face heat up. Luckily in the blue light he couldn't see it. I blink away from him, focusing back on the sharks swimming lazily around us. "You can measure the age of a shark by counting the rings on its vertebrae?""Fascinating," Baz drawled. But he was standing closer to me, and his voice dropped a pitch."These are tiger sharks," I babble to him because I can't handle that his hand is brushing against mine. Our knuckles grazing. His arm only a few centimeters away. "They're like swimming garbage disposals. Their diets are broad and they eat pretty much anything.""So what you're telling me, is thatyou'dbe a tiger shark," Baz is leaning his face downwards to me.He's going to kiss me. He's going to kiss me in this tunnel where it's just the two of us and our hands are touching. God, I want him to.





	You're Getting Warmer

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TiPhoney](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TiPhoney/gifts), [WeirdFangirlingPersona](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WeirdFangirlingPersona/gifts).



> No beta, beware of errors.

****

** SUNDAY **

I come home from work feeling sticky. Ebb only had me on schedule for half a day, so by three I'm already in the shower trying to get the sweet smell of sugar off my skin.

Once I'm done, I throw on some track shorts and lounge on my bed with my phone. Checking Snapchat and then Instagram. Looks like Agatha was at another horse event, with Dev and his cousin. _Baz_. I ignore how my heart skips a beat at the sight of his smiling face.

Overall summers are boring. Working at least keeps me busy.

It's hot outside and it's creeping into the apartment. The fan and shorts only do so much to alleviate me. I run hot, which doesn't help.

My phone began buzzing in my hands and I sigh heavily. My Dad's trying to contact me because my birthday's coming up. June 21st is right around the corner. He only ever bothers with me on the occasional birthday and every other Christmas.

My Father, David, isn't in the picture much. Hasn't been in the picture since I was a baby. The last time I really saw him was when I was eleven, he had promised to take me for the summer. It was a lie, of course, it always was. He showed up the day after my birthday with a ceremonial sword as my gift and a pat on the head. My Mom wouldn't even let him into the building, so it was all done on the apartment stoop. He didn't even offer to take me anywhere. I cried so hard that night, my Mom held me and cried with me.

When I was younger my mother used to make excuses, used to go on about how absorbed he was in his work. Which was true, he gets into his own head too much. He's a professor at New York University and teaches about Ancient Societies. I ignore the third time he tries to call and send a quick text telling him that I'm still working.

My Mom asked me what I want to do on my birthday too, but honestly, I just want to enjoy my last summer before I start my senior year of high school

Before Dad called, I was stalking people on Instagram. Going through Dev's recent posts for the chance to catch a glimpse of his cousin.

I'm so pathetic.

Summers just give me too much time to think.

Am I the only kid who feels this way? Well, guess I'm not going to be a kid for long, I turn 18 soon. It's just that I'd rather be at school. I'm not the best student, but I'm social. I know everyone, and everyone knows me, and it's actually pretty fun. Penny, my best friend, says that I'm too social. But how is that even a thing?

I'm a jock and sort of popular too.

I'm part of the lacrosse team. I wanted to play soccer but was shit at it. Plus Baz is on the team, and I guess it worked out better I didn't join. This way I can watch him practice. He's all legs you know, and I enjoy the way his shorts ride up and how his socks go to his knees.

Penny says I talk about him too much. Honestly, she's not wrong. I think about him a lot too. The way his hair waves over his forehead, how he's three inches taller than me, how his eyes are a gray that's really a mix of greens and blues. The fact that his skin is a gorgeous caramel tone. Even the way he's always mocking me. Even with a slightly crooked nose, he's still painfully beautiful. Actually, a crooked nose did his face wonders, because it was too perfect. Nobody should look that perfect.

Which is a problem.

It took me almost two years to fully realize that what I feel toward Baz, what I've always felt towards him, _wasn't_ hate. 

We met when we were eleven and starting middle school. Baz hated me on the spot because his Father hated mine. I didn't even know who he was. We had all the same classes together. All advanced courses, which I did alright in. Honestly, I'm not even sure how I got into them. Back then I was still going to speech therapy because I didn't talk well, I still rather not talk if I could help it, but he made my life hell because of that. Baz is an eloquent fucker, he talks like a fucking dictionary. We'd get into fights all the time and I'm surprised we were never kicked out of school. I punched him in the face and broke his nose when we were twelve, he pushed me down a flight of stairs and broke my arm when we were thirteen.

Fifteen was the year everything came to a crest. We were obsessively stalking one another. It would have been really creepy if it had just been me stalking him, but he did it back to me! We'd take photos of each other from afar and Snapchat each other, and we'd put random items in each other's lockers. Once I sent him a bouquet of hate flowers just because I knew he'd know what it meant. In return, he sent me a basket of sugar-free baked goods. (I ate them to spite him because fuck him for thinking that I'd let good food go to waste!) It was honestly ridiculous. It also made me realize that hate wasn't the word I thought of when Baz came to mind.

It hit me in the shower of all places. I was wondering what I could do next to him, what would work. Maybe I could find the worst book ever written and send it to him or something, and then I began to remember how he had smiled at the bouquet he found at his desk in homeroom. How he had laughed to himself once he realized what they meant. How happy he looked for the rest of the day. It got me hard, his smile. His smile got me achingly hard.

The next year we kept orbiting each other, but it wasn't as intense. Which means that for normal folks, we're still intense.

It wasn't until I turned seventeen that I realized that I was in love. I was in love with Baz. I wanted to run my fingers through his black hair and kiss his stupid pouty face. He had a face that always looked like it was in a pout, with his sad eyes and full mouth and sharp cheekbones. I wanted to suck at his neck, I wanted to bite him. I wanted to touch his body and lick every square inch.  Every. Square. Inch.

It drives me insane, how badly I want to kiss him. How I want to take him by the back of his neck and just give it my all. To feel his lips pressed against mine. I imagine that I'd be happy to die kissing him.

The last school year ended with us on amicable terms. We'll always fight, that's just the way we are. We're both stubborn as fuck. But last year was nice because it wasn't as bad. We still had a few advanced classes together, and we were even forced to do a group project with both us and Agatha. Which was painfully awkward because Aggie had the biggest crush on Baz, and it hurt since he flirted back with her. They looked good together, her gold to his silver. She's like the sun and he's the moon, or something poetic like that. He never asked her out though, and Agatha wasn't one to be bold enough to ask out a guy. Unlike Penny who outright asked Micah on a date last year, they've been together since. Micah was good for Penny, he calmed her down a lot, and intellectually they were on the same level. I like Micah, he treats her right.

Baz isn't bothering me as much this summer, then again it just started maybe two weeks ago. But he usually sends me hate Snaps or he'll text me insulting memes, things that honestly make me laugh because they're funny as fuck. He's got a morbid sense of humor, but I love it. I love him.

My name is Simon Snow Salisbury, I'm seventeen, I work part-time at Ebb's Parlor, and I'm hopelessly in love with Baz Pitch.

And it hurts because he hates me.

"Si!" My Grandma's voice floated from the living room, "come help me clean out the hallway closet."

"Be right there!" I call back to her before rolling off the bed and throwing on a shirt. Ever seen the show Friends? The hallway closet was Monica's hallway closet. I swear. It hasn't been emptied out since my Mom was a kid.

My Grandma has trash bags ready and I take in a deep breath, ready to get started. The shelves are from floor to ceiling in there, and deceptively deep. Fuck, this was going to take the rest of my afternoon.

My phone buzzed again, but only twice. A text.

[ **Pennywise** ]

 **Penny** [14:23]: Want to come to the skatepark with me and Micah around 5?

 **Simon** [14:23]: Can't. Helping Gram clean.

 **Penny** [14:24]: Such a good grandson!

 **Simon** [14:25]: Stfu. She's giving me a dirty look. G2G. Byyyeeeee!!!

 **Penny** [14:26]: Have fun!

 

** MONDAY **

It's Monday afternoon, which means that Ebb's Parlor was empty. Ebb's is named after the owner, and it's a vegan ice cream shop. On Friday's and Saturday's this place is usually filled to the brim with people lined out the door.

Luckily, I'm not scheduled for Saturday this week.

But it's a random Monday. I sit on the stool behind the register, leaning against the counter and watching random Instagram stories on my phone. 

I should really listen to my summer reading. I can't concentrate on actual reading, like words on paper, it always puts me to sleep, but if I can listen to it then I'll absorb it. My Mom already paid for the books that are downloaded into my Audible account. It's dead in here, I could start listening to them, get a head start on those papers that needed to be written about them.

I'm fishing for my portable speaker from the bottom drawer under the register when the bell above the shops' door pings.

"Welcome!" I say before I pop up, a bright smile automatically on my face. I force it to drop when I spot Baz coming in.

Of course. Because this is my life.

It's been two weeks since school let out and we haven't seen each other since. He hasn't sent me a single Snap or IG, and I've made sure to do the same. I feel like things have cooled off too much, that maybe I've missed something and screwed something up between the two of us.

"Snow," Baz nods in greeting as he reads the menu above me.

I bite my lower lip to prevent myself from correcting him. He's the only person who calls me by my middle name. No one else does. I hate it. But I also _love it_  because no one else does that. Just like I'm the only one who calls him Baz. Everyone else calls him Basil or Basilton. His first name is Tyrannus, but no one calls him that (I call him Tyrannosaurus sometimes just to be an ass).

"I'll have a large Ube Coconut Shake please." He orders, gray eyes finally making contact with my blue ones.

"Do you want whipped cream?" I ask with a slight tilt to my head. I'm peering at him through my lashes, I could feel some of my curls falling across my forehead, and I know I look utterly ridiculous but I can't help it. I'm trying my best to flirt with him, but I know I'm shit at it.

Baz stares at me for a moment (probably wondering what the hell's wrong with me), before he slowly nods.

"Yeah, that'll be good." He reaches into his pocket for his wallet as I ring him up.

The milkshake isn't hard to make. Ube powder, coconut milk ice cream, and maple syrup are some of the component ingredients. The whipped cream isn't real cream, but it tastes okay. Too sweet for my liking.

I pass him the drink once I'm done, watching as he sticks a paper straw into it and taking a sip. He gives a half smile, which was his way of showing that he liked it. And I want him to stay a little longer, he's lingering, maybe he wants to stay a little longer too.

"How's your summer going?" I ask as I wipe down the counter.

It's not even dirty, but I can't handle being under his gaze. I can smell his cologne from across the counter, all cedar, and bergamot. Smooth and woodsy, and so Baz that I feel like I can drown in it and die happily.

Baz arches a brow at me. He always does that. I used to think it was his way of making me feel like an idiot. Now I know it's a diversion, a tactic he uses whenever he tries to figure out what to say. "It's barely even started. How's yours?"

I shrug. "Work and home, for the most part."

He nods, "I'm working at my aunt's record shop." He then winces to himself, as if he hadn't meant to tell me that. He probably hadn't. He doesn't really want me to know much about his life and that sucks

I think Baz feels the shift between us as well because last summer he would've said that as a taunt. Like, where he worked was so much cooler than a vegan ice cream shop. Which it is, I'd rather work with music than with food. I'm always sticky and left smelling like waffle cones, even after I take a shower the smell of cinnamon is permeated into my skin.

We're starting our senior year and it feels like we're shedding the children that we had once been. Like we're becoming men, and that our boyish fights are a thing of the past. We both go to the same STEAM centered private school. STEAM is an acronym for Science, Technology, Engineering, Art, and Mathematics. You have to be extremely smart to get in, even the lowest of students are brilliant. I got in on a lottery because my Mom couldn't afford it, I wrote a paper and did an interview and apparently I "wowed" the board of directors enough to get in on scholarship.

"Dev is throwing a party at his place since his parents are out of town," Baz wet his lips, and I watch the drag of his tongue. "It's Saturday if you're interested. It starts at nine."

"Oh!" _An invitation_? Christ, we really were changing. I wish I could accuse him of plotting something, but my paranoia that he was plotting to kill me had died years ago. "Yeah, that sounds awesome. Can I bring—"

"Yeah," Baz cut me off, he looked like he wanted to apologize for his manners, but he never apologized. "You can bring Bunce and Wellbelove too. I know you and Agatha are dating, it would be weird if you didn't bring her."

A real party sounds like an experience. I've never gone to one before, were they like how the movies portrayed them? Wait did he just say me and Agatha are _dating_?

"No, we're not," I feel a confused smile creep onto my face. "Aggie and I aren't dating, where did you get that idea?" Shit, are people saying that? Is that why she's never able to get a date? People probably think I'd beat the shit out of them if they flirted with her.

Baz blinks at me, "you're not dating?"

"No," I stop pretending to clean the counter and was give him my undivided attention. I add, "We never were."

"That's good," Baz is staring at me and his gray eyes are so clear. It was good that I wasn't dating Agatha? It was good for what reason? Was he interested in her? "For Dev. He's got a massive crush on Agatha."

I can't help but suspect it's actually _him_ that has the crush, "Oh yeah? Best of luck to him, Aggie's tough."

Baz nods and gives a quick goodbye, a flimsy excuse of having to get to work thrown my way. Then he was gone and I was left alone again.

I suppose our interaction wasn't a waste. I was invited to my first parent-free high school party. I take my phone out and open the group chat that Penny and Agatha and I have.

[Group Chat: **The Golden Trio** ]

 **Simon** [12:45]: Guess who just got invited to Dev Grimm's party this Saturday?

 **Agatha** [12:46]: US????

 **Penny** [12:46]: Dev personally invited you? Or did someone just mention it to you?

 **Simon** [12:47]: Baz invited me. He said I could bring you two.

 **Agatha** [12:47]: Idgaf who invited us, this is going to be fun!

 **Agatha** [12:48]: Wait…Basilton invited us? I just saw him at the club yesterday and he didn't mention it.

 **Penny** [12:49]: Did Basil text you, Si?

 **Simon** [12:49]: No, he came into the shop. Ordered a shake and told me.

 **Penny** [12:50]: Ah.

 **Agatha** [12:51]: Awwww!

 **Simon** [12:52]: ???

 **Agatha** [12:53]: You're so oblivious that it hurts me.

 **Penny** [12:54]: Fuck this, I know we promised not to say anything Ag, but it's been a painful 6 years of watching this.

 **Simon** [12:55]: Guys what're you talking about?

 **Agatha** [12:56]: Go for it Pen.

 **Penny** [12:57]: Basilton is in love with you.

 **Agatha** [12:58]: PREACH!

 **Simon** [12:58]: But…he hates me?

 **Penny** [12:59]: JFC.

 **Agatha** [13:01]: Have we ever lied to you?

 **Penny** [13:03]: He's doing that thing he does where he goes quiet.

 **Agatha** [13:05]: Simon!!!!

 **Penny** [13:07]: Si?

 **Agatha** [13:08]: Maybe you broke him.

 **Penny** [13:10]: Maybe I did. But I don't want them to miss their chance.

 **Agatha** [13:11]: #Truth.

 **Simon** [13:13]: I'm working, I'll text you guys later.

 

** TUESDAY **

[ **Aggalicious** ]

 **Agatha** [12:13]: When do you get off work again?

 **Simon** [12:14]: 3.

 **Agatha** [12:14]: Cool, I'll meet you at Ebb's & we'll walk over to Fiona's after.

 _High Pitch_ is a place that I have never been to before. The record shop has darkly tinted windows, the open light was red. The front door had a glass pane and I could see that there were people inside. Fiona, Baz's aunt, runs the store and lives above it with Baz.

"Come on," Agatha nudged at me.

Agatha has a softer touch than Penny. Penny would've called me a little bitch. It still doesn't help with my nerves. We're here because my Grandmother and I found her old record player in the Closet of Doom ™. It still worked and played LP's. When I found out I was excited, I like the scratchy sound of records, but all my Grandma owned were old fashioned stuff from the late 70s and early 80s, and not even cool ones like Bowie or Queen.

Which meant a trip. One that Agatha had suggested in the group chat. Penny had to turn down coming, she had something planned with Micah.

So that's why we're out on the pavement, staring at the shop, late on a Tuesday afternoon.

"He might not even be working," Agatha pointed out. Her bleached blond hair was up in a high bun and she had these tiny shorts which showed off too much of her legs. 

I tried not to feel inadequate. I'm wearing my work uniform and black-framed glasses. My new contact prescription wasn't going to come in until next week. I looked like a fucking dork. If Baz was in the shop then he probably looked good. He always looked good. "I'm just looking for something low-key. Nothing too mainstream."

"You're such a fucking hipster, it's disgusting," Agatha sighed as she ushered me inside.

It smelled of dust and ink. Metallica was playing softly from the speakers, the walls and flooring were black, and there were posters for local bands all over the walls.

"Welcome!" an unfamiliar voice greeted from behind the register. I turned to look at the guy. Niall Kelly. Tall and ginger and one of Baz's minions. (Best friend, actually, but Baz was a dick who claimed that he didn't have friends – he had minions.) "Oh hey Agatha, Simon."

"Hey," I greeted before moseying over to the rows of LP's that looked to be kept in alphabetical order.

Agatha, on the other hand, batted her lashes at Niall and gave him a coy smile as she leaned against the register counter. Fiddling with the stacks of stickers that were kept there. Probably getting all of Niall's secrets out without even trying.

There were a few other people. I ignored everyone and began to dig through the vinyls

"What're you looking for?" His voice startles me.

"Jesus Christ, you need a bell on you," I breathe before I glare up at him from behind my thick lenses. I already know that my glasses make my eyes look a million times larger. That's how blind I am.  "I'm just looking, why? Are you actually going to do your job and help me?"

"I ask because I wasn't sure if you were literate and could read what the covers say," Baz retorts easily.

"Get fucked, Baz," I retort coolly before attempting to ignore him. But I know he's staring at me in an unnerving way. Finally, I break and glance his way briefly, my mouth pinched. "What?"

Baz raises his eyebrows at me, "I've known you since we were eleven years old. When did you get glasses?"

"Like two years ago?" I tell him while pretending to focus on the records again. "I just always wear contacts, but my new order doesn't come in until next week." I've never allowed him to see me in them because I didn't want to give him fuel. I didn't want him to find something else to make fun of me for, and my Clark Kent glasses were the perfect ammo for teasing.

My heart is racing with him so close to me. I try not to allow my fingers to tremble as I flip through albums casually without actually seeing what the covers say. He's close enough that I can smell him. I try to discreetly inhale as deeply as possible.

I know Baz is watching me, scrutinizing my every movement. I can't feel my face heat up under his attention. I'm probably blushing like an idiot. I swallow uselessly and can feel his eyes follow the movement of my Adam's apple. I have what my Mom calls a ‘swan neck', meaning it's long, and like the rest of me it's covered in moles and freckles. Baz is staring at the mole just under my jaw hinge.

If he _is_ in love with me, what would happen if I make a move? We're graduating next year and we'll be going to different schools. Baz was going to Yale, while I was going to New York University (with David, let's all cringe). It's not like it'd be far, we'd both be in the tristate area, but it'd still be long distance and I'm not sure if we could manage that.

 _If_ he loved me, why did he never tell me? Baz must've had his reasons for not taking whatever it was between us further. We have chemistry, enough to blow up the sun. Unless he thought I wasn't interested, he had insinuated that I was dating Agatha, which was hilarious. He must not know that I'm gay. I thought it was pretty obvious.

"Well, they don't look bad," Baz finally managed to spit out while motioning to my glasses. That was the closest thing to a compliment that he's ever said to me.

I can't help but give him my attention again, a smile brightening my face, "is that your way of saying that I look good?"

Baz frowns, but it looks forced. Exaggerated. It's the type of quirk he does with his mouth whenever he's trying his best not to smile. I know this because I've been studying his face for the last six years. I know this because I know his face almost as well as I know my own.

"I don't believe I said that, Snow," Baz eventually retorts. But it comes out soft and not as scathing as he was aiming for it to be. This asshole, he can't even admit that I look good? It wouldn't kill him.

"Oh please," I roll my eyes at him and peer up at him from beneath my lashes before focusing back on the albums, "we both know that you're hot for me."

I couldn't see his face, but his choking on nothing made me want to grin.

"Did you find anything yet?" Agatha asks, popping up from seemingly nowhere. I forgot that I came with her. Baz had this way of taking all of my attention.

"Uh, no," I shrug, "Grandma has _Sonny and Cher_ , I mean, I could always listen to that."

"Take this one," Baz leans over me and quickly scans the T's before handing me a Talking Heads album. His chest is pressed against my shoulder for a brief moment, and I could feel his body heat through our shirts. I know I still smell of cinnamon and sugar from work, but his scent is heady. Fuck I love his cologne.

"Thanks," I manage to say without stuttering, "You're not giving me this one to fuck with me, are you?" I wouldn't put it past him.

Baz rolls his eyes at me, "surprisingly, no. This is actually one of my favorites."

My heart beats even harder at the admission. I smile brightly up at him, and it widens as I realize he's blushing.

"Cool," Agatha cuts in because she knows that we tend to get stuck in our own world sometimes. "Go pay so we can get some food."

"Food does sound like a good idea," I nod. I had a roast beef sandwich for lunch, but that was hours ago and my stomach was tightening with hunger.

"Niall will ring you up," Baz told me as he begins to turn away with a milk crate of records to reshelve in his hands.

"Basil," Agatha touches his arm and I feel envy course through me. I wish I could touch him so casually. "So I was talking to Niall," she starts as I walk away to pay for my LP.

Agatha waves to both Niall and Baz as we leave the store, she links her elbow with mine. We're automatically walking to her place because I'm a gentleman and because the train station is close to parents building so it'll be easier for me to hop on one to head home. And because her Mom always keeps the best snacks in stock.

"You're off Thursday, right?" She asks me casually. But with Agatha there's always something more, she and Penny are horrible together.

"Why are you asking?" I give her a side-eye.

"Well, I was thinking we could go to the New York Aquarium, it opens at ten and we can spend the day there. I heard there's a new shark exhibit." Agatha says this all casually. As if she doesn't know how much I love sharks and aquatic life.

"That's in Brooklyn, right?" I ask, "who is this ‘we' that you're thinking of? Penny, Micah, and us?"

"Well yeah, and Niall, Dev, and Basil." Agatha shrugs, but her grip on my arm tightens.

"Aggie!" I groan.

"What? They're my friends too, this isn't about you Simon!" It's a bald-faced lie, but I let it slide.

"Fine," I sigh, "but only because of the sharks."

"Good," We're in front of her stoop now, Agatha peers up at me with her wide brown eyes. "Wear that blue shirt we got you. It'll bring out your eyes."

 

** WEDNESDAY **

[ **T-Rex** ]

 **Baz** [10:01]: This gif reminds me of you.

 **Baz** [10:01]: <GIF>

 **Baz** [10:02]: Unlike you, the dog falling landed on its feet.

 **Simon** [10:02]: YOU PUSHED ME DOWN THE STAIRS!

 **Baz** [10:03]: Allegedly.

 **Simon** [10:04]: "Allegedly" my ass.

 **Baz** [10:05]: At least you don't have a crooked nose.

 **Simon** [10:06]: You must be bored if you're bothering me.

 **Baz** [10:07]: I'm at work. The store is empty.

 **Simon** [10:07]: Why not bother your friends?

 **Baz** [10:08]: My minions are indisposed.

 **Simon** [10:09]: You only have 2 friends, why do you call them that?

 **Baz** [10:10]: Because it's a fact. Do you work today?

 **Simon** [10:10]: I'm scheduled to close later. Right now I'm meeting up with Micah to play B-ball.

 **Baz** [10:11]: I hope you lose.

 **Simon** [10:12]: Bite me.

Micah and I are at the park playing basketball.

Or, we were, but our game is done now that the sun is fully up and the mid-afternoon heat beats down around us. My shirt is clinging to me like a second skin and my glasses keep falling off of my face due to the sweat.

We're chugging Gatorade from our bottles as if our lives depend on it. He's sitting on his ball, balancing easily with his legs stretched out before him while I'm on the curb with my book bag beside me. I work this afternoon and already know that I won't have time to go home and bathe like I want to. It'd have to wait.

Micah has the most symmetrical face that I've ever seen. Honestly, if I weren't so gone on Baz I'd probably have a crush on him. He has skin the color of mocha and bright green eyes, and when he smiles his teeth are perfectly straight and bright white.

"Your hair looks good," I comment. Because it does. He's just gotten a fade done, and the lines are clean. I try not to let my shaggy curls bother me, but it's longer than I've ever had it before. "I need a haircut."

"Bro, _don't_ do it yourself. Premal did my hair, he'll charge you like ten bucks for it." Micah says around the rim of his bottle. "I can text him now and we can get this shit over with before you go home and decide to give yourself that ugly buzz cut."

"Fuck you," I laugh, he's not wrong. "I didn't even know Premal was back in town for the summer."

"Nah, only for a week or so. He goes on that school trip to New Zealand and will be gone for like a month," Micah has his phone in his hands. "Cool, he said we can go over now if you want. Be prepared for you getting bitched at for going to see him all gross."

"That's because Premal is mad prissy," I respond as I stand up. "Think Penny'll feed us lunch?"

Micah snorts, "My future wifey cook? We'll be lucky if she gives us water."

It takes us fifteen minutes to get to Penny's house by train, the sweat has cooled off and my deodorant makes me smell spicy instead of gross. Pacey answers the door as soon as we ring the bell. I don't know Pacey well, he's fifteen and goes to an art school. He and Penny don't really get on well. Then again, Penny and her siblings all argue constantly. I'm not sure they know how to communicate any other way. I don't envy Micah for deciding to be a part of the Bunce's.

"Simon!" Penny exclaims in a very un-Penny like way from the kitchen. She nearly tackles me with her hug, but I hold her just as tightly. It's only been two weeks since we've seen each other, but for us, it's a lifetime. "Premal's in the backyard with everything set up, I told him to give you an undercut, since you've got the curls for it."

Penny's own thick curls are in a large bun at the top of her head. She's probably one of my most favorite people in the world, and upon seeing us you wouldn't guess that we're platonic soulmates. She's grinning up at me and I just want to squeeze her. I love this girl almost as much as I love my Grandma and Mom. She's that important to me, and I hope she always stays that important to me. In the few weeks since school has ended, she's beginning to look different, more of a woman and less like a girl. Or maybe I'm just starting to notice that she's changing. I guess we're all changing, slowly becoming adults.

Penny's short, probably almost an entire foot small than me. She's not skinny (she's thicc), with hips that frankly scare me because she likes to hip check me quite a bit and it tends to send me flying. She's got these sharp cat-eyed glasses that you typically only see old school librarian's wear, but she rocks them. She dyes her hair a different color every few months, her Mom keeps telling her she's going to go bald that way. Currently, she's rocking fire engine red hair, and it looks great with her cinnamon skin.

"An undercut?" I repeat, she's been dying to get me to cut my hair like that for ages. "Fine, but if I don't like it I get to shave my head."

Premal has a fold out chair resting on top of an open trash bag in the backyard, obviously ready to do the minimum cleanup. I nod hello to him and take my wallet out of my backpack and slide him a ten.

"Please don't fuck up my hair," I say to him by way of greeting. Premal's been away at college for two years now, but he looks the same as he always has, only older.

"Fuck you," Premal rolls his eyes before taking out a razor and getting to work.

Once he's done I change into my work uniform in Penny's room since Pip was in the only bathroom, and couldn't help but stare at myself in her mirror for two minutes.

My hair is just….Wow. I can't help but wonder how Baz would react when he finally sees it. I pray he doesn't harass me for it.

 _Simon, stop being so pathetic_. I shouldn't care about what Baz thinks. Except that I totally do.

I say my goodbyes to the Bunce's and Micah before taking a train back into the city to get to the ice cream shop.

I work the closing shift at Ebb's and feel stickier than ever as soon as the night is done. Luckily it's a Wednesday, so by nine, I'm on the way home.

My Gram and Mom are both still up by the time I drag myself into our apartment. I'm literally dragging my bag behind me.

"There's a plate for you in the microwave!" Mom calls out to me, they're watching the news together.

The plate is filled with carbs. Delicious spaghetti with meat sauce. Fuck yes. After pouring an inappropriate amount of cheese on top of it, I nuke it and then take my hot plate to the living room to sit with them for a few before I take my shower and crash.

"Nice haircut!" Mom perks up, she reaches out and touches the faded sides. "I love it!"

"Thanks," I grin before taking a bite of my late dinner. More like inhale it. Once I'm done I put the empty plate on the coffee table and lean heavily onto my Mom.

"Did you have a good day?" Gram asks me.

"Busy," I yawn my answer.

Mom rubs my back and I drink her in. I used to do this a lot as a kid. Curl up to my Mom and absorb her every way that I could. We look alike, same blue eyes, same broad frame. Only she's blond and I'm brunette. We've both got a galaxy of freckles on our forms, and moles.

"Don't fall asleep on me Si," Mom prods at me, "go take a bath."

"Blah," I respond while forcing myself to get up and wash my dirty dishes before doing as I'm told. I crash as soon as my head hits my pillow.

 

** THURSDAY **

I stare at my reflection.

My shirt is a collared short-sleeved button down, it's blue and has little white sharks printed all over it (they're so small that from afar they look like polka dots). I love this shirt but rarely wear it for fear of messing it up. It's snug around the shoulders but in a good way. My shoulders are naturally broad, and the shirt makes me look like I'm jacked, makes my pecs look amazing and my arms appear firmer than they are. It's slimming around my torso too. I completely understand why Agatha told me to wear this.

I put the pomade that Premal made me get in my curls, moving them forward a bit. My hair's bleached due to the sun, it's more bronze than brown now. The product makes the curls appear shinier and better put together. Honestly, a faded undercut feels weird, but it looks really fucking good. 

I grin at myself in the mirror. Who was this guy before me? I've never cared much for how I looked, but damn. Even with my glasses on, I know I'm a damn snack.

Gram is in the kitchen drinking her coffee.

I grab myself a mug along with a sour cherry scone she had slathered in butter ready for me. It was from the bakery down the block and it was the best thing I've ever eaten in my life. "Going to the aquarium today with everyone."

"Looking as sharp as you do?" Gram gave me a knowing look that left me squirming. "Who are you meeting up with?"

I sigh, staring down at my burgundy Vans, "Penny, Micah, Aggie, Dev, Niall, and Baz."

My Grandma just grinned at the mention of Baz. Of course she did. Before I realized my own feelings, she knew, she always did. Gram was perceptive like that.

"When are you leaving?" She asked instead. At least I can thank whatever deity above that my family doesn't actively try to embarrass me. I'm awkward enough as it is, thanks.

I swallow my breakfast before answering, "Aquarium opens at ten. So soon. Aggie wants to get there before it gets crowded. It's a Thursday, so I'm not sure how crowded she thinks it's going to be." I debate on eating more before deciding not to, which will leave me hungry later but I can always get a big lunch.

[Group Chat: **Squad** ]

 **Penny** [09:24]: Micah and I are heading out now.

 **Simon** [09:29]: Same!

 **Agatha** [09:30]: I know I setup the time, but I'm running late!!!

 **Simon** [09:30]: Wait…are you saying that I'm going to be on time while Aggie is late? Has hell frozen over?

 **Micah** [09:33]: Are we getting lunch after this?

 **Simon** [09:34]: Lunch sounds good.

 **Penny** [09:34]: Please, if you're going to wax poetic about food, do it strictly to each other.

 **Simon** [09:36]: You're kinky.

 **Micah** [09:37]: I'm saying, after the aquarium, we should get sushi.

 **Micah** [09:38]: *When your GF starts laughing out loud at her phone at the subway station and you pretend you don't know her.*

 **Penny** [09:40]: I'll cause a scene if you don't come back.

 **Simon** [09:41]: You're such a sadist Micah. That's sick. But I'm down.

 **Penny** [09:42]: Is there good sushi in Brooklyn?

 **Micah** [09:43]: Don't hate on other burrows. We can Google it.

 **Agatha** [09:43]: Leaving my house now!!!

 

 **Simon** [10:04]: I'm here!

I get off the train and walk the remainder of the way. Its summer but it's probably the coolest day that it's been in a few weeks. I place my phone in my pocket and head towards Coney Island, it shares the boardwalk with the aquarium. I know that they had renovated it, so everything should look different.

Baz is loitering near the ticket booth, casually scrolling through his phone. He's wearing a green short-sleeved button-up, his hair is back in a bun at the base of his neck, his dark jeans are cropped at the ankle and he has on Sperry's. Fuck him and his hot preppy looking self.

His eyes peered up at me through his lashes for a moment before he easily slid his phone into his back pocket and stands up straight, making sure to tower over me. He thinks I hate when he does that, and a part of me does, but I also fucking love it.

"You're early," I comment while coming closer.

He doesn't say anything, only stares at me. Mouth slightly slack, "I'm on time."

"You okay?" I give him an unsure smile. 

He swallows and turns away from me, "your haircut took me by surprise."

I laugh, "Yeah, I'm trying to get used to it."

"Mm," He folds his arms across his chest.

The urge to reach up and kiss him is strong today. Especially with how good he looks. I don't get to though, Penny, Micah, and Niall are walking up towards us together. Guess they met up while on the way here. We make small talk with each other, and it's another ten minutes before Agatha and Dev arrive.

"They just opened up the new shark exhibit," Agatha comments.

"That's why I wore my shark shirt," I tell her.

We get in line to order our tickets, we're told about upcoming shows, and then were allowed in. It's not particularly large. Actually, it's quite small, but that doesn't matter to me. I love it. At one point Baz and I are looking at the sea turtles, trying to get a good picture of them on our phones when we realize that our friends ditched us.

"Do you think this was planned?" I ask him. I get a strong feeling that it was, but I don't mind, I can pretend that this is a date. It's not, but if it were it'd be perfect.

"This isn't a big place," Baz states, "We'll run into them eventually. Want to check out the sharks?"

"Fuck yes," I grin.

It's dark in the shark exhibit, and there's a section about finning that gets me righteously angry. Baz has to usher me through there quickly, a nauseated look on his face at the videos and models of finned sharks left to die.

We walk further in, our hands continuously bumping since it's so dim and I don't want to lose him. Not like I could, it's fairly empty.

The glass walkway underwater is the best part for me. The floor is even transparent.

"Did you know," I shifted my gaze from the tiger sharks swimming above us to Baz and froze. He wasn't even looking at the dome above us. He was watching _me_.

"Do I know?" Baz arched a brow.

"Um." Fuck. I lost my train of thought and could feel my face heat up. Luckily in the blue light he couldn't see it. I blink away from him, focusing back on the sharks swimming lazily around us. "You can measure the age of a shark by counting the rings on its vertebrae?"

"Fascinating," Baz drawled. But he was standing closer to me, and his voice dropped a pitch.

"These are tiger sharks," I babble to him because I can't handle that his hand is brushing against mine. Our knuckles grazing. His arm only a few centimeters away. "They're like swimming garbage disposals. Their diets are broad and they eat pretty much anything."

"So what you're telling me, is that _you'd_ be a tiger shark," Baz is leaning his face downwards to me.

He's going to kiss me. He's going to kiss me in this tunnel where it's just the two of us and our hands are touching. God, I want him to.

He suddenly remembers himself and stands upright. Taking a step away from me and the sudden distance leaves me cold. Where our fingers had been beginning to curl into each other, he began to pull away, but I held onto him firmly.

"Snow," Baz's voice is soft, "Simon, what're you doing?"

"Holding your hand, dickwad. Way to ruin the mood." I make a show of rolling my eyes at him. He called me ‘Simon'. I'm such a sad excuse for a man, my name from his mouth causes my insides to warm exponentially. "I guess we can go find the others, right? I mean, they left us alone for a while now and are probably wondering if we've killed each other yet." Or kissed, but I don't say that part out loud.

"Are you going to continue to hold onto me?" Baz's gaze is everywhere but me now. I've never known him to be shy.

"Do you not want me to?" I find myself asking. I don't want to make him uncomfortable.

His grip tightens around mine, but he shrugs, "I don't care."

Fucking liar.

I jut my chin at him, "I don't either."

Guess we're both liars.

 

** FRIDAY **

It's my only day this week where I'm opening and closing at the shop. I know that it'll be quiet until about dinner time, so I put my speaker on with my audiobooks for school and begin making fresh waffle cones. Some need to be dipped with various condiments on top. Easy busy work while I listened over the background music that Ebb plays over the shops' speakers.

She's in the back office doing whatever it is she does. Honestly, I think Ebb stays back there and reads when she has nothing else to do. It's her shop, so it's not like I care, I think the main reason she stays with me during my shift is that it's illegal to leave me alone otherwise.  She's a nice lady though, around my mom's age, and apparently really good friends with Baz's aunt.

A little after noon the bell to the front door chimes.

"Welcome!" I call out from the waffle maker, "be right with you!"

With skillful fingers, I take the waffle out and fold it into the correct shape and leave it to the side to get cool. I think I've made enough to last until Sunday. Ebb doesn't like having cones older than two days, and I don't blame her. It tastes better fresh.

I've had a smile on my face since yesterday when Baz let me hold his hand the entire outing. We went to Coney Island after and hung out at the shore, playing random games and eating fair food. I think we all had a better time doing that than the aquarium (except that the sharks were the best part).

I turn to the customer and can't help as my smile widens, "What can I do for you today?"

Baz is still looking up at the menu, not giving me eye contact until he's ready. "I'd like to try that Pumpkin Mocha Breve shake."

My nose wrinkles automatically, "that's like drinking a candy bar."

"Good, give me the largest size you have," he states while taking out his wallet.

I pause my audiobook and ring him up.

"Was that the summer reading?" He asks as he signs his virtual receipt.

"Yeah, it's usually dead in here during the day, so I figured it'd be a good time to listen to it," I state while getting the ingredients together.

I've spoken to Baz four times this week after going nearly two weeks of radio silence. I've missed him more than I've realized.

"Which books did you choose?" He asks once I'm done with the blender.

" _Pride and Prejudice_ , _Slaughterhouse Five_ , and _One Hundred Years of Solitude_ ," I tell him while adding a heavy dosage of whipped cream to his beverage and then extra pumpkin sauce over it before putting the lid on it. "Have you started your reading yet?"

"I've actually just begun _One Hundred Years of Solitude_ ," Baz takes the drink and puts his paper straw in through the opening on top. "The magical realism is astounding."

"Ah, I've just started _Slaughterhouse-Five_ ," I shrug. "I'll let you know when I read _One Hundred Years_ though, we can discuss it."

 

"I'd like that," Baz tells me, the lighting of the store causes his eyes to appear almost silver instead of the typical muddied gray. It makes my heart to skip a beat.

He's so pretty, I hate how good-looking his stupid face is. Honestly, why is he so attractive? It isn't fair. He kind of has that vampire look going for him, except that he's not that pale. He's got the intense look though, high cheekbones that sharpen his face, a widow's peak on his forehead, a long skinny nose. I hate how much I don't hate him.

"Are you going to Dev's tomorrow?" He asks while running a hand through his hair to move it out of his face. He's wearing it down, it's falling across his forehead in these perfect waves. He's in a David Bowie t-shirt and has dark washed skinnies on which emphasize his long legs.

"Uh," I begin, "yeah, of course. Unless your uninviting me?"

"No," Baz licks his lips and I follow the movement of his tongue (I always fucking do), "I was just wondering. This is great by the way." He was talking about the drink.

The disgustingly sweet contraption that hurts my teeth whenever I attempt to try it. Who knew that Baz has such a sweet tooth?

I chuckle, "I'm glad you like it."

"I'll see you tomorrow night," Baz says by way of goodbye, "I need to get to work."

"Have a nice day!" I call out as he leaves. What a lame thing to say to him, and I regret it as soon as it tumbles out of my mouth. But I spy him smiling as he leaves, so I figure that I'm fine.

My phone buzzes under the register, and for a second I think it's Baz texting, but instead, it's my Dad attempting to make contact again. With a heavy sigh, I hit the decline button.

Way to ruin the mood Dad, that's something that you've always been great at. Even now, in a situation that has nothing to do with you. I should probably call him back before he tries to contact Mom, but I doubt he has the balls to try that.

"Ebb, I'm going to take my lunch," I tell my boss while poking my head into her office.

She looks up from her laptop and nods. Pretty sure she's watching Netflix.

Ebb looks like a Norwegian model. Tall and long, with pin straight platinum hair and clear blue eyes. She wears layers of baggy clothes and is the most sensitive person I know. I really like her. I can appreciate how in tune she is with her feelings, and kind of envy it.

"Alright," Ebb gives me a soft smile, "I'll cover the front, take your time, go enjoy your meal."

[ **Pennywise** ]

 **Simon** [13:01]: Why is he so good-looking? I hate him.

 **Penny** [13:03]: Fuck, you haven't met your quota for the day yet. Fine, go on.

 **Simon** [13:04]: He came in the store again and ordered that disgusting drink I hate.

 **Simon** [13:04]: Which of course he fucking loves. Wtf is wrong with him?

 **Penny** [13:05]: Keep going.

 **Simon** [13:06]: He asked me about the summer reading. And told me that we can discuss One Hundred Years of Solitude

 **Penny** [13:07]: That was nice of him.

 **Simon** [13:08]: Too nice. He's fucking plotting something.

 **Penny** [13:10]: Probably to get into your pants.

 **Simon** [13:11]: I fucking wish.

 **Simon** [13:12]: I'm so fucking thirsty Pen.

 **Penny** [13:13]: I know Si.

 **Penny** [13:15]: So, the hand holding yesterday, that was cute.

 **Simon** [13:16]: I just went for it. I think he was going to kiss me but chickened out last minute.

 **Penny** [13:17]: Agatha and I have been cooing about it all night. Maybe you should kiss him next time.

 **Simon** [13:18]: Next time?

 **Penny** [13:19]: Si, you're a person of action. We're going to see him tomorrow at Dev's party. Take the chance. By the way, I'm not really interested in going to this stupid thing. I'm only going because you all are.

 **Simon** [13:20]: I know.

 **Simon** [13:21]: You think I should go for it?

 **Penny** [13:22]: FFS, please do.

 **Simon** [13:23]: Like you weren't bad about Micah?

 **Penny** [13:23]: Not for 6 years.

 **Simon** [13:24]: Stop being salty.

 **Penny** [13:25]: I'm just hoping that when you two finally get together that the obsessive talking about him will stop.

 **Simon** [13:26]: You don't think he'll punch me for trying?

 **Penny** [13:27]: Simon. You've met your quota for the day.

 **Simon** [13:28]: My lunch break is almost over anyway.

 **Penny** [13:29]: Thank God!

 **Simon** [13:30]: You love me.

 **Penny** [13:30]: Unfortunately.

 

** SATURDAY **

[Group Chat: **The Golden Trio** ]

 **Agatha** [09:58]: TODAY IS THE DAY!

 **Simon** [09:59]: Please don't text me this early on my day off again.

 **Agatha** [09:59]: What are you wearing? I'm thinking of going shopping for something cute.

 **Penny** [10:01]: Really? It's just a high school party, not that big of a deal.

 **Agatha** [10:02]: Maybe I want to look cute.

 **Penny** [10:03]: You'll look fine in anything? Are you trying to impress someone?

 **Agatha** [10:04]: Why would I have to be wanting to impress anyone?

 **Simon** [10:05]: Please, it's too early for the fighting.

 **Agatha** [10:06]: Yeah Penelope.

 **Penny** [10:07]: Are you going shopping then?

 **Agatha** [10:08]: Yeah, want to come?

 **Penny** [10:09]: Sure, I'll be over in half an hour.

 **Simon** [10:11]: Thank God.

It's noon by the time I roll out of bed, I'm typically an early riser, but after my long shifts I tend to sleep like the dead. I'm alone in the apartment, and not wanting to get up. I really just want to sleep more. This it the first time this week that I'm able to just _be_. I lounge in bed and doze for most of the day, the parts that I'm fully awake for have me listening to my summer reading and taking notes on the worksheets that the teachers emailed to us at the end of the school year.

Even on my day off, I'm working.

I make dinner early for my Grandma and Mom so that I can eat as much as I want without someone judging me for it.  I leave the food warm before jumping into the bathroom to shower and shave. Maybe I should keep my scruff, it's not a lot, but I like it.

My phone buzzes as I watch Netflix. I'm hoping it's not my Dad again.

[ **T-Rex** ]

 **Baz** [14:22]: Do you have Trixie's phone number?

 **Simon** [14:22]: Here < **Trixie Pixie** >

 **Baz** [14:23]: Thanks.

 **Simon** [14:24]: Why do you need to contact Trixie? She's not your type at all.

 **Baz** [14:25]: Oh Lord, believe me, I don't want her having my number It's for Dev, he needs someone to pick up alcohol for his idiotic party.

 **Simon** [14:26]: You don't sound excited about this at all.

 **Baz** [14:27]: You're going, right?

 **Simon** [14:28]: Of course.

 **Baz** [14:28]: Then I'll be there.

Holy shit. I can feel my ears heat up, I can feel the blood rushing to my face at the words before me. Oh God, oh wow, he just came out and said it. He just let it out there.

 

Around eight I leave for Micah's house. My mom knows that I'm going out with friends, it's a Saturday night so she's not too worried. She knows I'll be home in time for my curfew.

Micah and I take the train to Penny's station and then the three of us go to Agatha's. From there we walk to Dev's house.

"I heard his parents are in Europe," Agatha tells us.

Dev's parents live only a few blocks from Aggie, we get there well past nine, which works. We're not early, we're fashionably late. I think it's a good thing? There are already a few people milling about, I'm guessing most of our graduating class has been invited to this thing because there are a lot of people from school here.

There's terrible music coming from somewhere in the living room, and the dining room table is being used for beer pong.

Niall approaches us quickly, apparently a co-host. He gives us red Solo cups and motions to the kegs in the kitchen and the beers in the coolers.

"Where's Basil?" Penny is asking for me. I'm so glad that my best friend is also my mind reader.

"Uh," Niall huffs a breath, "fire escape? He wanted to smoke a cigarette."

My friends begin to chat with various classmates of ours. I silently excuse myself for the fire escape at the end of a hallway that has doors that lead to empty bedrooms. 

The smell of smoke hits me before I catch sight of my prize. My heart is thumping wildly in my chest as I climb out of the window and take a seat next to Baz.

"Snow," Baz greets from around his cigarette. I'm not even sure how he managed to get a pack, he's still seventeen. He probably took them from his aunt. He has an unopened water bottle on his other side.

"Basilton," I nudge him playfully. "Enjoying the party?"

"What's the point of this party? What am I getting out of being here?" Baz snubbed out his cigarette. "It's stupid."

I can't help but laugh, "So you're against random hookups and underage drinking?"

I move closer to him, our shoulders pressing now. 

Baz sighs, "I suppose that's the experience everyone's going after, just not me."

"So, you're a straight and narrow sort?" I arch a brow at him.

Baz let's out what's his version of a disbelieving snort. "We both know I'm not straight, Snow."

We're so close to each other. I can just lean forward. I should just lean forward. I need to kiss him _now_ , this is my moment, this is the perfect opportunity.

Baz's eyes have darkened in the dim lighting. His hair is tucked behind his ears, but it waves close to his cheeks.

I need to do this.

"What?" Baz asks me, his eyes narrowed. He's noticed that I've silently been staring at him for the last few minutes.

"You're so pretty," I tell him, and then I kiss him.

Kissing Baz is different than I imagined it in the past. He's responsive, our mouths fit perfectly against one another. He tastes of cigarettes and chocolate and _Baz_. I hum at it, I can't help it. My hands are in his hair and his hands are on my shoulders.

We break apart and I can't help grinning.

"What the fuck, Snow?" Baz's face is flushed.

"You called me Simon at the aquarium," I suddenly remember, my grin still firmly in place. Our noses are touching, and I can't help giving him an Eskimo kiss.

Baz nuzzles me back, "no I didn't."

I laugh, he's such a fucking liar. I'm happy, so happy, the giddiness in me is hard to contain. I don't want to. I feel like I can explode.

"One kiss and you're acting like the world is turned on its head," Baz mutters into the space between our lips. But he's smiling just the same as me.

"Two kisses," I correct him before leaning forward again.

**Author's Note:**

> If you like my fics and want more feel free to follow me on **[tumblr](https://moonllotus.tumblr.com/)**!


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